On the weekend I went out shopping for two things, our first BBQ and a new mobile phone. E. got me a voucher for Barbeques Galore so that was where I was going to purchase our new cancer-maker from. The nearest store was near Southland so I figured I might as well get my new phone from the Crazy Johns near there too. The adventures begin …

Barbeques Galore

The story begins when a salewoman approached me and began her sales pitch. She rabbited on about a bbq I just happened to be walking past at the time. I finally got to talk and began to describe what I was actually after. We looked at a few models and I made my selection.

“So, what price can you do for me on that?”
“Ahhh, no discount I’m sorry.”
“Why don’t you check with your manager?”
“Nup, still no discount.”
“How about this, I’ll pay you the full price now and even purchase the wok burner attachment?”
“Nup, still nothing I can do for you.”
“That’s a shame. Can’t you even throw in something small like a cover to seal the deal?”
“Nup, sorry, can’t do.”

This actually went on for a few minutes. Disappointed at my lack of success, I handed over my gift voucher.

“Ahhh, this is over a year old. I’m not sure that we can accept it.”
“It doesn’t have an expiry date. You have to accept it.”
“I’ll need to check with my manager.”
“You do that.”
“OK. Should be alright to use.”
“Thought so.”

I was getting quite agitated now. Channeling Veruca Salt I wanted this BBQ now. The saleswoman went to check the stock. It seemed that only half of the BBQ was there. They were out of stock for the pedestal section. How they could stock half a BBQ is beyond me. So, what were my options?

1. Wait two weeks for one to maybe arrive, then drive in to pick it up
2. Drive to Richmond to pick one up myself

Neither option appealed to me. They couldn’t even transport it from their Richmond store. Apparently it costs too much! I expressed how disappointed I was with the experience. Finally I felt like I had some traction. “What can we do to help?” she asked. “How about you throw in a cover?” “Nup, can’t do that, sorry.” Bastards!

So, I picked up my half a BBQ, drove to Richmond and picked up the rest.

Crazy Johns

I usually avoid shopping at the “crazy” places but I thought I’d try my luck this time. Nothing could be worse than buying a BBQ from Barbeques Galore.

The sales guy here was pretty good. He actually asked me questions about what I wanted and how I wanted to use the phone. We selected the i-mate JasJam and sat down to go through the paperwork.

They had to give me a new SIM card for the new phone and it seems that their computers weren’t working properly today. The guy said he’d put through the paperwork in the evening and I could drop by during the week to sign it and pick up my paperwork. Defeated once again, I began to drive home to Mornington.

Having nearly reached home, I realised my mobile wasn’t working. I couldn’t get any network service. I did the only thing I could do, drive back to Crazy Johns and blast them for cancelling my SIM.

As soon as I walked in the door, the guy apologised. He had tried to put it through again and didn’t realise it went “all the way through” transferring my account to the new SIM card. I was pretty pissed off with having to drive over 50km for this mistake.

I signed the contract, got my new phone and asked for a deal.

“I’m pretty upset that I had to drive so far because of this mistake.”
“Yeah, I’m really sorry about that.”
“So how about this, you give me a good deal on a micro-SD card for my phone.”
“No problems. We don’t have them in stock at the moment though.”
“That’s cool, just post one to me when you do.”

Feeling good about this, I drove off back home again. After 5 minutes, I got a phone call from Crazy Johns. He accidentally gave me both copies of the contract and wanted me to drop one back to him. Damn it!

I turned around, pulled up out front of the store and he rushed out to grab their copy of the paperwork.

“Look, I’m really sorry about this.”
“That’s ok. It just means an even cheaper memory card for me!”

They’re now organising their Mornington store to get a memory card ready for me, which they are actually provided free of charge. Awesome!

What a difference

What a difference compromise makes. I will never ever recommend or purchase anything from Barbeques Galore again. I will always recommend Crazy Johns as my preferred phone supplier.

Google have published a top 50 ideas list on strategies for combating global warming. The interesting thing is that these ideas were collated by young students. The full list can be found here on the Google site. Following are the top 10…

1. Include global warming/climate change in school curricula (as part of National Science Standards), so when the students are in charge they can make educated decisions.
2. Increase availability of low-interest Energy Efficient Mortgages to support homeowners who increase the energy efficiency of their homes.
3. Put light sensors in all office and school buildings so all lights go off when the rooms are empty.
4. Require that all products contributing to global warming be marked with a specific color (e.g., chemical pesticides could be marked with a red sticker for being extremely dangerous to the environment).
5. Use less paper; use the back of the paper to print on or write on; use recyled paper.
6. Plant more trees to reduce carbon dioxide in the atmosphere.
7. Teach recycling techniques in classes and school-wide programs.
8. Make recycling mandatory in all public facilities, such as schools, parks and beaches.
9. Do public service announcements on TV featuring celebrities promoting carpooling, walking, riding bikes, using public transportation, conserving electricity and recycling.
10. Give grants and tax credits to companies that invest in alternative, sustainable, emission-free fuel technologies while ending such subsidies for fosssil fuel production.

Good to know that our future population are thinking about these things. The problem is, it’s still up to us oldies to act on it now.

Owning an iPod, DVD recorder or camera phone could soon become illegal in Australia. Proposed changes to the Copyright Bill make it illegal to load tracks onto your iPod, even if you legally own the original CD.

The new bill is a result of the Free Trade Agreement between Australia and the U.S. An obvious mechanism to try and protect the music and movie associations of the U.S. Once the issues with more legitimate use were raised, ammendments to the bill were proposed. These ammendments actually do nothing to protect the more accepted usage of iPods and MP3 devices.

Ironically, exceptions in the bill were supposed to legalise copying music from a CD to a device such as an iPod but Kim Weatherall, law lecturer and associate director of the Intellectual Property Research Institute of Australia, said the exceptions were too narrowly drafted.

The exceptions allow users to make one “main copy” of a CD as well as “temporary copies”, but the temporary copies must be destroyed at the “first practicable time”.

Loading music onto an iPod involves having one copy on the device and another on the computer in iTunes, meaning the user has two main copies in addition to the original CD. This is illegal even if the new bill is passed.

The Age, The $65,000 question: do you own an iPod?

So, sell up your iPods and MP3 devices, and stash up on those old portable CD players. The current Australian Liberal government is clearly living in the past with no concern or forethought for future innovations.

Al Gore is in the Aussie press again today. His meeting with Steve Bracks yesterday morning seems to have gone well.

”I’ve heard some very forward leaning positions here,” said Gore after a morning meeting with the Premier.
The Age, When Al met Steve

The fact that a previous international political leader met with an Australian local Premier is pretty awesome. Whilst I still think we can do heaps more, the lift in profile is definitely a useful one.

Gore has also commented on Howard’s push for nuclear energy.

“Mr Gore said nuclear power was unlikely to play a significantly bigger role in the climate change battle. “Even if you set aside the problem of long-term waste storage and the danger of operator accident and the vulnerability to terrorist attack, you still have two others that are more difficult,” he said.

The first problem was one of economics. [...] The second was nuclear weapons proliferation.”
The Age – The truth? ‘Nuclear is not the answer’

Instead of backing nuclear energy, he challenged Howard to stand up and join the rest of the world by adopting the Kyoto protocol. In Nairobi, they are beginning to discuss the next stage of the protocol. This is a prime opportunity for our Prime Minister to raise his concerns and contribute to the process which the rest of the world is now a part of.

There’s been a fair bit of talk on the climate change issue lately. Especially with the looming Victorian election. As usual, I have a problem with this. Most of the talk has been just that, talk. There is very little detail in any of the policy statements. Very little real action. Here is a random rundown …
Desalination
Let’s look at the Liberal Party’s desalination project. Contrary to what is often spun in the press, the party isn’t actually proposing a desalination plant. What they are proposing is a “feasibility study.” No real action spoken about. So, if elected, the Liberal Party of Victoria will conduct a feasibility study for a desalination plant which uses up more energy and produces only 10% of one dam’s volume of water. Here is some more info from the ACF on issues with desalination plants.
Doing it yourself
Also in the press are articles about people who have spent money to greenhouse proof their homes. The Brod street house is a prime example. This guy spent an additional $40,000 on a $250,000 renovation to gear up his home so it produces pretty much all the energy it consumes. What is in place for us not so financially fortunate to contribute something similar?
Rebates and subsidies
The article in The Age mentions some of the rebates provided by Sustainability Victoria when you convert your gas heater to a gas/solar model. Currently, if you pump power back into the grid (e.g. through your solar panel), the power retailer will reimburse you the wholesale price for that energy. If elected, the Victorian Labor Party is saying they will legislate so that power retailers must reimburse the retail cost for power pumped back into the grid.
Al Gore says Howard is “the” man
In other news, Al Gore has said today that he sees our PM as the man to change the US’s position on climate change.

Mr Gore, in Australia to capitalise on the success of his global-warming documentary An Inconvenient Truth, said he was unsure of Mr Howard’s intentions but encouraged by his comments.

He said it was unclear whether Mr Howard’s comments heralded “a genuine change in substance” but it was clear Mr Howard, who recently saw An Inconvenient Truth, was prepared to acknowledge the threat of increases in CO2 emissions. “If Prime Minister Howard’s statement is a prelude to actually joining the world community on the basis of the Kyoto treaty and then negotiating some changes that he would like to see, there’s nothing wrong with that,” Mr Gore said.

Al Gore in Australia
And finally, Al Gore is in Australia at the moment ready to train his first set of “climate change messengers.” This is a project done in conjunction with the ACF. The project aims to train people to give a localised version of his “Inconvenient Truth” presentation. Kind of like the pyramid scheme of climate change.

Yes, you heard right, they went to court to figure this one out.

“Breaking! News! Flash! “A sandwich is not commonly understood to include burritos, tacos and quesadillas, which are typically made with a single tortilla and stuffed with a choice filling of meat, rice, and beans,” wrote Massachusetts Superior Court Judge Jeffrey Locke in a decision issued last week.”
From: Boing Boing

The fact they called in “food experts” to testify in this case is absurd. We can all sleep soundly now, the sanctity of the humble sandwich is preserved. Even Google Fight thinks so.

Full article on Yahoo! news.

The other day I committed to moving from QWERTY to a DVORAK style keyboard.

Earlier this week … I printed out a Dvorak style keyboard layout and placed it on my desk, changed my Window’s settings and  forged ahead.

I failed fantastically. It was much harder to change than I thought.

It all hit when I had to whip up a document in an incredibly hurry. Typing like a two year old on ritalin just wouldn’t cut it. I sad a sad goodbye to Dvorak and went running back QWERTY.

I’ll try again next week when things hopefully calm down a little.

It’s really not all that far away. Only 9 years.
A report by “The Orange Future Enterprise Coalition” (set up by Orange Business Services in Britain), has some interesting predictions regarding the future.

Whether predictions in “The Way To Work” report eventuate or not, we are certainly going to be facing some huge changes in the way companies are run and business is managed.

Management Line (The Age) provides a good summary of the four scenarios in the report:

Disciples of the cloud: Companies have pooled together to save costs on office space and services, strong lines of demarcation between work and non-work (which could create big issues for people wanting work-life balance), and there’s a bigger focus on IT and teamwork. Also a lot of what you do is monitored.

Electronic Cottages: Employees working either from home or commuting short distances to a small hub or office. There is a stronger sense of community, with more people pooling together to help out on child care and crime prevention. Working life and everyday life are much more integrated.

Replicants: Everyone’s a consultant. Not many people are directly employed and it’s not unusual to be working for two to three companies simultaneously. Working life is less predictable and secure. And since work is unpredictable, people work hard for part of the year before taking huge slabs of time off. Companies take little responsibility for staff and people have to look after and find work for themselves.

Mutual Worlds : The big focus is on local communities with people preferring to work in small local ventures rather than big business

Why does all of this worry me?

Quite simply, I might get left behind!

Perhaps I’m just feeling the effects of hitting 30, but I notice that it is becoming more difficult to make fundamental changes to your notions of work. After years employment, ideas and values become very embedded. Your choices are based on prior experience and that experience is based in a world of the past.

I see a strong need to change. A need to adapt. A need to reconnect with life and the purpose for living.

In the next years to come, as the next generation begin to enter the workforce and thrust a new model of work upon us, how will we cope? How will we deal with our notions of work being challenged. How will our leaders (being my generation) manage this change.

A commenter named “The Futurist” makes an interesting prediction of the future:

Generation Y workers would get used to travelling the world, in search of work. Many would leave Australia to avoid paying their HECS debts.

More double income households will retire by 50, due to ‘burn out’ from high stress jobs; and ability to do so from income from investments to get through the years before collecting two sets of superannuation nest eggs for the later years.

The ageing society will be in full profile with many jobs for looking after the disabled elderly and people with dementia.

The workplace of 2016, Management Line blog, The Age

Whatever happens, it’ll certainly be an interesting ride.

I was in Sydney last weekend as a gift from my gal. Aside from being a wonderful weekend, I could help but notice the effects the terrorism message had.

The lonely briefcase
We arrived at Sydney airport and queued up at the end of a very long line to catch a taxi. The line stretched around a number of barriers so we pretty much started 2 metres away from where we eventually finished. As the line continued to shrink, and we continue to get closer to the road, someone pointed out an old black briefcase sitting all alone in the queue.

There were no shrieks of “argghhh, it’s a bomb,” although the people near it, immediately took a few steps back, us included. Almost like it had become a natural instinct. Once guy summonsed the taxi rank manager dude. He was pretty much a traffic director who hadn’t yet passed his test to direct traffic on an actual road.

He looked petrified and urgently called for security. Yelling out for someone to claim the case, one tall gentlement who was on the phone stepped forward. The taxi rank guy blasted him, telling him he must never ever, under any circumstances leave his bags unattended. It became immediatley obvious to me that this guy took his job, and protection of Australian from terrorist acts, extremely seriously.

The tall guy took his briefcase and moved back to his position in the line. He obviously didn’t like this briefcase because less than a minute later, he placed it on the ground and walk away from it again.

Ice cream
I love a good ice-cream when it’s raining, so, on one of our walks we purchased some. Now, they had two scoops which were huge. I finished mine pretty quickly as I often do, but E. was struggling to finish. I convinced her that it was okay to throw the rest away so as we walked, we looked for a bin.

There were no bins near us so I took the ice-cream and carried it for E. We were just near Central station with plenty of people walking all around. I proceeded to try to give the ice-cream away but no-one took me up on the offer.

As we walked to the train platform we continued looking around for a bin (or a parent who would let their child eat our gift of fresh ice-cream.) The ice-cream was slowly melting so I decided to keep it in check by having some of it as we walked. I was already full so didn’t want to consume the whole lot.

There was not a single bin in sight so we proceeded to the train platform to look there. We reached the platform and couldn’t find a single cylindrical device to throw this melting ice-cream into. It was then I remembered that Sydney removed most of the public bins for fear they would be used to plant bombs. How annoying was this.

Rubbish bins have been removed from Sydney’s underground stations but remain on many suburban stations.
Sydney Morning Herald

Well, the train arrived and we boarded. By the time we got to our station, the ice-cream was gone. No, I didn’t leave it under a seat, I had to eat it.

After that trip, I felt really ill. It didn’t worry me however. I just reminded myself that it was my duty as a citizen to help keep bombs out of Sydney rubbish bins.

Difference of opinions
We started our trip back to Melbourne. Arriving at the airport, we proceeded to the security scan area. Regardless of whether I’m carrying a bomb or not, I always get nervous walking through those doorways. On the way to Melbourne, both E. and I got pinged. I had to take off my belt, E. had to take off some bracelets.

E. was better prepared this time. She placed her bracelets on the belt to be x-ray’d. I thought I’d try my luck again. I nervously walked through the doorway and to my surprise, I passed! E. passed through as well (but she had cheated!) Interesting how different airport scanners pick up different clothing material.

I picked my backpack up off the belt. Before E. could grab hers, she was escorted aside to go through her back. They spotted something on the x-ray which looked suspicious. Working methodically through the bag they placed her wallet, diary and phone into a tray, and rescaned the lot.

The suspicious object still appeared, and it was still in her bag. They continued to work through it and eventually found, hidden in an inside pocket, a large nailfile. It would’ve been at least 3 inches long.

So here’s my conclusion, if you want to smuggle some metal object onto the plane, place it in your hand luggage if your departing from Melbourne. Then, as you go through Sydney, transfer it to your person and you’ll be right!

For a very long time now, I’ve been thinking of moving to a ‘Dvorak‘ style keyboard. I spend so much of my life infront of a screen that my eyesight has already suffered from it. Over the last few years, my arms, wrists and hands have also begun to suffer.

You see, the QWERTY keyboard was developed to actually slow down typing speeds. Back when typewriters were being developed, if typists hit the keys in too quick a succession, the typebars and hammers would jam. To solve this problem, the QWERTY layour was developed which kept the most frequently used letters away from each other. Christopher Sholes is to blame for this monumental contribution to carpel tunnel syndrome.

In the 1930s, a chap called August Dvorak started his campaign to rid the world of this now unecessary layout. The layout he developed placed the vowels and commonly used consonates in the middle row of the keyboard, with less frequently used keys near the outer edge.

By rejiggering the keyboard, Dvorak also solved the Qwerty board’s most irritating feature: having the letter J stuck smack-dab in the middle, in perhaps the primest real estate around—where one’s right index finger hits the board. How often do we use that wretched letter? Almost never. For example, George Orwell uses it a mere 29 times in his “Politics and the English Language.” He uses the letter K, given maybe Qwerty’s second-best piece of real estate (right hand, middle finger) a mere 170 times. By contrast, Orwell uses H and T, given the same prime spots on the Dvorak board, 1,180 and 2,258 times, respectively.

Make Mine Dvorak, Slate, Feb. 5 2002

So, I am now actually going to do this. I will sacrifice my current fludity and speed for a short slow period of learning to type again. Where to begin … I have a number of options here:

• Grafitti an existing keyboard
• Botch up an existing keyboard
• Purchase a Dvorak keyboard

I’ll give this a little thought over the weekend and then on Monday I’ll begin on my new typing adventures.

NB. The image is of the “Hansen writing ball“. Nothing to do with Dvorak or QWERTY, but cool non-the-less.